When it comes to being a successful speaker, it’s not just about what you say—it’s about what you do on stage and behind the scenes. The truth is, some of the most impactful actions you can take as a speaker are also the most uncomfortable.
The good news? You’ve got permission to take these bold steps!
Today, I’m going to share practical tips on how to execute these 15 uncomfortable actions with a little more confidence. Some of these I’ve tried myself, others are on my “to try” list, but all are designed to help you stand out.
So, give yourself permission to try these actions, practice intentionality, and see what happens.
1. Taking Effective Pauses
One of the hardest things for me has always been slowing down…
Sometimes I find myself talking faster than an auctioneer at a cattle sale.
Michael Port, among others, taught me the power of the "three-second rule." During moments of silence, count in your head:
"One one-thousand, two one-thousand, three one-thousand."
It will feel like an eternity, but if you practice this during rehearsals, you'll build comfort with silence and use it effectively for transitions. Write it into your script, put it on your note cards, and see how it feels. Soon, you won't be counting... you'll be thinking about exactly why you're pausing.
2. Drinking Water Strategically
This isn’t just about staying hydrated—it’s about creating natural transitions in your speech.
I use water breaks as a natural transition in my presentations. I rehearse the exact moments when I'll drink water, so it never feels like an interruption.
My water bottle is always placed in the same spot on stage—usually next to the speakers or the stairs. Rehearse this action until it feels seamless and avoid using the water bottle as a nervous fidget.
3. Saying “I Don’t Know” with Confidence
Kris Kelso's TEDx talk on "humble confidence" opened my eyes to this concept. It's perfectly okay to say...
"I might be wrong, but..." or "I don't know the answer to that, but let me find out."
Using language like this maintains your credibility and builds trust with your audience.
4. Moving Effectively on Stage
Stage mapping and blocking is another technique I learned from Michael Port.
As an example, travel from stage right to stage left while you’re telling about key moments in a story – pausing along the way to highlight specific events. From the audience’s viewpoint, it will look like you are going from their left to right – which is how we read text – and feels like you are creating a visual timeline on stage.
Nifty, right?
5. Making Meaningful Eye Contact
Eye contact used to throw me off my game. I started practicing this skill in smaller rooms where I could be intentional about looking people in the eye. Over time, this practice made it much easier to maintain eye contact on larger stages.
If direct eye contact feels daunting, start small and work towards larger groups like I did.
6. Engaging Without Rhetorical Questions
When you ask...
“How many of you have ever…?”
